When Remy requests that Vasquez (Danny Trejo) take over the "Big City Greens" theme, everyone’s favorite bodyguard uses the power of hard rock to sing about what his very untypical day is like.
Lyrics[]
Intro[]
[Cricket and Remy run around the house, when Remy crashes into a Theme Song Takeover logo.] Cricket: Huh? Remy: Oh, hey, look! [Vasquez crashes in through the window.] Vasquez: AAAAAGGGGHHHHH! What is it, Master Remy? Is this logo trying to hurt you? [Vasquez knocks the logo down.] Cricket: [laughing] Oh, Vasquez, it's a "Theme Song Takeover." [Cricket and Remy pick the logo back up.] Cricket: It means someone's going to take our theme song in a fun new direction. [gasps] What if you did it? Remy: Ooh! Yeah, Vasquez! You totally deserve your own theme song! Vasquez: Oh, Master Remy, you wouldn't want to hear me sing. The things I've seen, it changes a man...'s voice. Cricket and Remy: Please???? Vasquez: If it would bring you happiness, then it shall be done!
<poem>
=== Singing ===
<poem> Vasquez:
Every day I work so hard,
(Remy: Oh... aah..!)
Vasquez:
...to be the perfect bodyguard
I start each day the crack of dawn
Scanning for threats out on the lawn
Then I go through 12 dozen eggs
While lifting tree trunks with my legs
I defeat rivals with one punch
Then save time for a modest lunch
Take Master Remy to outings
Remy:
Everyone knows that it's proper
Traveling by helicopter
Vasquez:
He's seen all my orchids sprouting
Remy:
He looks tough, but he can't hide it
Vasquez has a softer side
Vasquez:
Then tuck him in at night
And live to fight another fight
Outro[]
Cricket: Wow, that was terrifying... and strangely sweet. Remy: Best bodyguard ever. Vasquez: Now run along, Master Remy. I need to repair the window I impulsively crashed through. Cricket and Remy: Bye, Vasquez. [Viper Fang enters, slowly clapping.] Viper Fang: Singing for children now, Tiger Fang? Vasquez: For the last time, my name is Vasquez. What do you want, Viper Fang? Viper Fang: I'm here to take over your "Theme Song Takeover." Vasquez: Over my bodyguard body.
Reprise[]
Viper Fang:
Viper Fang is in charge now
You cannot stop me, for I--
[Vasquez kicks the logo into Viper Fang, crashing into the window.]
Viper Fang: Ow! But I had some really clever lyrics!
[Vasquez stomps on the top half of the gnome he previously broke, breaking it again.]
Gallery[]
Click here to view the gallery for Vasquez Theme Song Takeover.
Trivia[]
This is the second Theme Song Takeover installment to use Flash animation after Baby City Greens.
This is the first Theme Song Takeover short not to feature Tilly Green.
Errors[]
On YouTube, the captions misspell Remy's name as "Remi".
In one frame, Viper Fang's eyes overlap his mouth.